Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Hey Kids, It's the Feast of St. Clare

St. Clare (or Clair or Claire - spelling wasn't a major issue back then. Living past 29 years old was) didn't want to marry the rich young man her parents picked out for her and ran away from home to become the biggest Francis of Assisi groupie. St Clare was too ill to attend Mass, she had reportedly been able to see and hear it on the wall of her room (she had phenomenal reception for the Middle Ages.) This led to her becoming the patron saint of television.

But I'm not sure if you pray to her for quality TV or to deliver you from all the bad TV out there. Perhaps, Snooki should pray to her.

I'd like to propose for beautification Steven Slater, the patron saint of wage slaves.

So after a hard day at the salt mines - go home, crack open a cold one (or two) and know that Steven feels your pain.

August 11, 1962 -
Booker T & the MG's released Green Onions on Stax, on this date.

Don't you just feel a little cooler having listened to that.

Today in History:
August 11, 1772 -
The summit of Papandayan volcano in West Java suddenly implodes, unleashing a catastrophic debris avalanche which blankets an area of 250 square km. Tumbling boulders flatten 40 villages and their 2,957 inhabitants.

People, this is what happens when you do not make the proper virgin sacrifices to the volcano gods. You can't throw just any old skank into a volcano.

August 11, 1919 -
Andrew Carnegie, industrialist, philanthropist, and founder of Carnegie Steel, died. Carnegie became a philanthropist in later life, giving away more than $350 million and building 2,509 public libraries. His value in 1999 dollars totaled $100 billion. The man who dies rich dies disgraced, was the motto of Andrew Carnegie.
Carnegie‘s last years were spent giving away as much money as possible in an effort to shed his image as one of the era‘s leading “robber barons.” Among other bequests to good causes, he established the Carnegie Institute of Technology and hundreds of Carnegie Free Public Libraries across the U.S

August 11, 1937 -
On this day, expatriate Edith Wharton died in France, and ex-expatriate Ernest Hemingway didn't, in New York. Edith Wharton died in France, in the quiet, Old World style she liked to live and describe; also on this day, and in New World contrast, ex-expatriate Ernest Hemingway bared his hairy chest to Max Eastman's unhairy one, demanded "What do you mean accusing me of impotence?" and then wrestled Eastman to the floor.

I'm not accusing Hemingway of anything, it's just Hemingway liked to strip to the waist, grease his body and wrestle smaller, slender men to the ground - sweating and grunting, stiffening, then becoming quite still.

That's perfectly normal.

August 11, 1956 -
Jackson Pollock famous abstract artist and public urinator, dies in an alcohol-related, single car crash on this date at the age of only 44, killing one of his passengers, Edith Metzger.

The other passenger, his girlfriend Ruth Kligman, survived.

August 11, 1984 -
Not realizing that his weekly radio address is already on the air, President Ronald Reagan quips into his live microphone: "My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."

It wasn't supposed to go out, but did. The Kremlin was not pleased . Oh that rascally dead President, such a kidder.

And so it goes.

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