
Here's your Today in History:
August 24 79 –
The entire city of Pompeii was fired by Mount Vesuvius. Vesuvius, ever the vengeful volcano god buried that happening spot by the sea, Pompeii, apparently to punish the debauchery that made the town famous. Tens of thousands of people perished only to have plaster casts made centuries later of the hollows their bodies once occupied. Once again, this is what happens when a city goes on the cheap and starts scarifying any old whore rather than a proper virgin.
August 24 410 –
In what was possibly the largest layoff in history, all of Rome was sacked.
August 24 1572 -
Troops loyal to the French crown alongside Catholic civilians massacre the Protestant Huguenots of Paris, estimates range between 20,000 and 100,000 deaths. At news of this carnage of this St. Bartholomew's Day Massacre, a gleeful Pope Gregory XIII ordered celebrations and a medal to be struck. Sometimes, you just have to be embarrassed to be a Catholic.
August 24 1814 -

The White House and other public buildings in the District of Columbia are torched by the British. The President's wife, Dolley Madison, is torn away from her ice cream and candy making duties to save a couple of chairs and an unfinished portrait of some dead Virginian Slave holder, Masonite and dope smoker.

August 24 1958 -
Red China commences the shelling of the islands of Quemoy and Matsu, which hold one-third of Chiang Kai Shek's troops. The United States threatens nuclear retaliation for this, but the American people do not support the stance. A very strange compromise is worked out, permitting China to shell the islands on odd dates and Chiang Kai Shek's troops to resupply the islands on even dates.
August 24 1989 -
Pete Rose is suspended from baseball for life for gambling
And So It Goes.
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