Saturday, September 26, 2009

What I've learned.

I guess I watch too much TV and read too many newspaper (and surf the web way too much.)

So far I've learned:

How to make crack cocaine.
How to correctly ventilate my home meth lab
How to make a trigger for a Thermo-nuclear device (don't ask, I'm in enough trouble at home over this.)
How to make backpack bombs (thanks to the New York Post yesterday.)

It has been suggested (screamed at me) that I could better spend my time finding out how to get a higher paying job.

Today's word is Molrowing: noun, carousing with prostitutes. Let's see if we can combined the words we have saved so far -

Gov. Spitzer decided to visit a local oporopolist while in Washington DC to supplement his intake of natural Vitamin C. While on his way there, he remembered he had an assignation with Ashley Dupré for a bit of molrowing with involved the lambitions of her thighs, which, of course, was an extra charge.

Today in History
September 26, 1895 -
George Raft was an American film actor who was most closely identified with his portrayals of gangsters in crime melodramas of the 1930s and 1940s, was born on this date. George may have achieved an unenviable place in Hollywood folklore as the actor who turned down some of the best roles in screen history, most notably High Sierra, The Maltese Falcon, Casablanca and Double Indemnity.

What a dummy.

September 26, 1580 -
Francis Drake returned to Plymouth, England, ending a three-and-a-half year journey around the world,on this date.

It was nearly four more centuries, however, before "The Beverly Hillbillies" premiered on CBS (on this day in 1962).

The lengthy lapse between these watershed events has never been explained.

September 26, 1687 -
Troops laying siege to Athens led by Venetian general Francesco Morosini rain cannon fire down on the Acropolis and the Turkish soldiers garrisoned inside. One cannonball penetrates the Parthenon, which happened to serve as the Turks' gunpowder magazine.

The roof, walls, and 16 columns are blown off by the resulting explosion.

Oops, sh*t happens.

September 26, 1937 -
The Empress of the Blues, Bessie Smith, sustains grave injuries in a traffic accident on US Highway 61. She is taken to a colored hospital in Clarksdale, Mississippi and her arm amputated. Smith dies later that day from blood loss.

According to legend, Bessie had been refused treatment by a closer, whites-only hospital.

September 26, 1960 -
Kennedy and Nixon face off in the first televised presidential debate. Nixon had been recuperating from illness yet refused to wear makeup for the camera, looking haggard and gray.

Radio viewers gave positive opinions for Nixon's performance but so many people saw the debate televised that Kennedy gained the lead in the polls, ultimately winning the election.

Remember what I said about Checkers, his kids' dog.

September 26, 1969 -
Beatles release the Abbey Road album in London, on this date.

Though work on Abbey Road began in April 1969, making it the final album recorded by the band, Let It Be was the last album released before the Beatles' dissolution in 1970.

September 26, 1969 -
An unsuspecting American public is forced to deal with the vaguely incestuous family comedy series 'The Brady Bunch' which premiered on ABC-TV on this date.

I don't even want to talk about the relationship between Alice, Sam the butcher and Tiger.

And so it goes

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