Monday, July 11, 2022

Sorry Elton, we want the sun to go down on us!

It was great foresight on the part of our beloved city forefathers to lay out the city in such a way that this happens every year just around my birthday.

Once again, the sun will be perfectly lined up with the east-west streets of New York.



So get outside to catch the 'Full Sun on the Grid' at 8:20 pm ET and enjoy it. (You can see it one more time tomorrow night but it might be cloudy. )


ACME would like to issue this public service announcement concerning Brain Freeze (also known as sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia) -

Now to the point at hand -



Why bring this up? The date today is 7/11 (at least in this country. Foreigners and other degenerates refer to the day as 11/7 but that's another story...)

The convenience store 7-11 usually celebrates their name day, so to speak (and their 95th birthday,) by giving away Slurpees to the "brain freeze" fearless public. Unfortunately Last year, 7-Eleven canceled National Free Slurpee Day to reduce the risk of transmission of COVID-19. It's back this year, but you do need to have a 7Rewards loyalty membership card. That doesn't mean you can't make a frozen concoction and home and toast 7-11 on your own. (The amount of alcohol you include in your celebratory drink is between you and your maker.


July 11, 1942 -
A classic 40s Merrie Melodies cartoon, Bugs Bunny Gets the Boid was released on this date.



Bugs asks Beaky "Why don't we do this more often?" and Beaky replies, "You mean just what we're doing tonight?" This refers to the 1941 Kay Kyser song Why Don't We Do This More Often?


July 11, 1965 -
One of the 60s best Beach movies, Beach Blanket Bingo opened today.



This was the final full appearance in a "Beach Party" movie for Frankie Avalon. He only appears in six minutes of the follow-up, How to Stuff a Wild Bikini.


July 11, 1969 -
The Rolling Stones released Honky Tonk Women on this date.



The Stones started recording this as a country song based on Hank Williams' Honky Tonk Blues. They made it into a rocker for release as a single and released the country version, Country Honk, a few months later on Let It Bleed.


July 11, 1969 -
Co-incidentally, David Bowie, released his single Space Oddity, supposedly in conjunction with the July 20th Apollo 11 moon landing, on this date.



In 1980, Bowie released a follow-up to this called Ashes To Ashes, where Major Tom once again makes contact with Earth. He says he is happy in space, but Ground Control comes to the conclusion that he is a junkie.


July 11, 1970 -
Three Dog Night started a two-week run at No.1 in the US with their version of the Randy Newman song Mama Told Me Not To Come, which was also a No.3 hit in the UK.



When the song came out, Randy Newman had yet to release any solo material. When he started recording his own material (starting with his 1968 debut album) many of the songs had already been recorded by others. Mama Told Me Not to Come was included on his second album, 12 Songs, which came out around the same time Three Dog Night issued it. Newman had little chart success as an artist in these early years, but Three Dog Night did, and their raucous rendition was the one listeners preferred. Newman at first dismissed them as a "teeny-bopper" band, but later rescinded that statement, saying he liked their version a great deal.


Word of the Day


Today in History:
July 11, 1533 -
The Church of England came into being on this date. The story of its origins is shrouded in sex and therefore important.

Henry VIII assumed the English throne in 1509, an energetic young man of seventeen. He immediately decided to have a male heir. This became the enduring theme of his reign and he consequently came to be known as The Son King (or, to his detractors, The Heir Head.)



Henry such a devout Catholic that he earned the title "Defender of the Faith" without even stepping into the ring. His first wife, whom he'd married before taking the throne, was Catherine of Aragon, who earned the nickname "Catherine of Aragon." Catherine was an excellent queen until she didn't have a son, at which point things changed.



By the 1530s Henry had realized he was married to a bad queen. He was now about 40 years old and therefore decided to get a convertible couch and a new wife.

The convertible caused no problems, but the changing of wives required the official permission of the Pope, who, being Catholic himself, refused to grant a divorce.

Henry divorced her anyway, and on July 11, 1533, the Catholic Church seceded from the Church of England in retaliation.



The Pope having withdrawn, Henry made himself the head of the Church of England. Because he was still the Defender of the Faith, he wrote the Act of Supremacy. This Act proved that the Church of England was better than the Catholic Church, that King Henry VIII was better than any Pope, and that a Single White King was back in the market.

Sir Thomas More had been the Lord Chancellor of England, and knew Henry as well as any man alive. He therefore refused to swear to the Act of Supremacy, and on July 6, 1535, became Sir Thomas Somewhat Less.

At this point in his career, Henry began marrying and divorcing women on a regular basis. The divorce process was expedited now that Papal authority was no longer a consideration. In fact, Henry turned the entire process into a game: his wives would be blindfolded and asked to produce a male heir.



It came to be known as "Bluff King Hal," and several centuries later it served as the inspiration for the popular French game, "Hungry Hungry Guillotine."


July 11 1804 -



Former Treasury Secretary Alexander Hamilton and sitting Vice President Aaron Burr duel in Weehawken, New Jersey after Hamilton allegedly slandered Burr during a political dinner in New York. Hamilton was shot in the liver and died the next day.



Meanwhile, Burr lives on to finish his term in office and is eventually tried for treason after attempting to raise an army and seize land for himself, either in Mexico or the Louisiana Territory.


July 11, 1859 -
Charles Dickens' novel, A Tale of Two Cities was published on this date.



The book, would become the best-selling, original English language novel of all time, with more than 200 million copies sold.


July 11, 1893 -
Japanese businessman Kokichi Mikimoto perfected his technique for creating hemispherical cultured pearls, producing the world's first cultured pearl on this day.



In the next 12 years, he would hone his technique, making spherical pearls that were indistinguishable from the perfect specimens rarely found in nature.


July 11, 1936 -
The Triborough Bridge in New York City was opened to traffic, on this date.



Built at the height of the Great Depression, the creation of the Triborough Bridge put thousands of struggling people to work. It also was New York City's first bridge specifically designed for automobiles.


July 11, 1937 -
I didn't even start playing the piano until I was about 13 or 14. I guess I must have had a little talent or whatever-you-call-it, but I practised regularly, and that's what counts.











Jacob Gershowitz, one of the greatest writers of the American songbook, died of a brain tumor at age 38 in Beverly Hills, California on this date.


July 11, 1960 -
The novel To Kill a Mockingbird, written by Harper Lee (the book is her only published work, until recently) was published, on this date.



The novel quickly became a classic and won the Pulitzer Prize for Literature in 1961.


July 11, 1979 -
The derelict space station Skylab finally returned to Earth, ignominiously breaking into 500 separate fragments which are swallowed by the Indian Ocean. That was, except for the ones which crashed into Woorlba Sheep Station, near Balladonia in Western Australia.



Shortly thereafter, President Jimmy Carter telephoned the prime minister of that country to apologized for scattering NASA litter on his nation.

Oops. (Leading up to the event, Electric Light Orchestra took out ads in trade magazines dedicating their new single, Don't Bring Me Down, to Skylab.)


July 11, 1997 -
Bodybuilder and wannabe actor Jonathan Norman was arrested for trespassing on Steven Spielberg's estate in Malibu, California on this date. Believing that the film director "wanted to be raped," Norman had brought along a kit containing handcuffs, duct tape, nipple clamps, chloroform, and a stun gun.

I never realized that Steven liked nipple clamps, he seemed more like a butt plug man to me. And I'd like to think he enjoys ACME Warming Bung Balm.



And so it goes.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Sir Thomas Somewhat Less, indeed