Thursday, November 25, 2021

But all that too shall pass.

While you're sitting around the table with your family this Thanksgiving, opine this - Americans sometimes eat as much as 5,100 calories today! The average person eats enough each Thanksgiving to gain 1.3 pounds. That would breaks down approximately as:

2 turkey legs (with the skin on)
6 oz. turkey breast (with the skin on)
2 cups mashed potatoes (made with butter and whole milk) plus 1 cup turkey gravy
½ cup cornbread stuffing
2 slices canned cranberry sauce
1 cup candied sweet potatoes with marshmallow
1 cup Brussels sprouts with walnuts
1 cup green bean casserole
2 crescent rolls
1 piece pumpkin pie with 1 cup vanilla ice cream
2 pieces pecan pie each with 2 Tbsp whipped cream
and 1 slice apple pie

(And now you know why people in the plumbing industry refer to tomorrow as Brown Friday.)

Each year, the president of the U.S. pardons a turkey and spares it from being eaten for Thanksgiving dinner.

The first turkey pardon ceremony started with President Truman in 1947, (however, the Truman Library and Museum disputes the notion that he was the first to do so or even if he pardoned the bird.) In December 1948, Truman accepted two turkeys and remarked that they would "come in handy" for Christmas dinner. President Biden pardoned Peanut Butter and Jelly turkeys the other day. They will live out the rest of their days at Purdue University in West Lafayette, Ind., unless the price of turkeys continues to rise.

(Literally, something completely different,)

Today is International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women Day. The day was established in 1999. The United Nations designated the day partly in reverence to the anniversary of the murder of three sisters in the Dominican Republic.

A report issued from the World Bank a few years earlier stated that about one in four women in the world would be, or had been, raped and that violence against women is as prevalent a cause of death as cancer.

(Let's take a moment and change gears)

November 25, 1933 -
An almost forgotten horror film, The Ghoul, starring Boris Karolff , Cedric Hardwicke, and Ralph Richardson (in his film debut) opened in the U.S. on this date.

For years this was regarded as a "lost film" with no prints or elements known to exist. A nitrate release print was discovered in the Czech National Archives in Prague. This print was a subtitled edited version that was in poor condition and contained numerous splices. Years later, a print of the uncut British version was finally discovered.

November 25, 1937 -
William A. Wellman's wonderful screwball comedy, Nothing Sacred, starring Carole Lombard and Fredric March, premiered in NYC on this date.

The snooty society matron who berates Hazel and Wally for "besmirching the memory of that gallant girl Hazel Flagg" is played by a well-known character actress whose acting career was on the skids when she accepted this role. The following year, she would take up the assignment for which she became famous - "Hedda Hopper's Hollywood" debuted in the Los Angeles Times in 1938 and eventually would be syndicated in hundreds of newspapers across America, making Hopper the rival (and equal) of William Randolph Hearst's popular gossip maven Louella Parsons

November 25, 1940 -
Walter Lantz's introduced Woody Woodpecker with the release of Knock Knock on this date.

Although Woody made his first appearance in this film, he doesn't have a name until his next film, Woody Woodpecker.

November 25, 1942 -
Raoul Walsh's bio-pix about the boxer, James Corbett, Gentleman Jim, starring Errol Flynn, Alexis Smith, Jack Carson, Alan Hale, William Frawley, and Ward Bond, went into general release in the U.S. on this date.

Errol Flynn did all of his own boxing stunts in the film, and although production was shut down for a time after Flynn suffered a mild heart attack, he came back and finished the picture without ever using a double.

November 25, 1987 -
The now classic John Hughes' Thanksgiving film, Planes, Trains and Automobiles, starring Steve Martin and John Candy, premiered in the US on this date.

On instruction from John Hughes, Edie McClurg's role as the St. Louis rental car agent was partially improvised. Hughes told her to simply riff a fake phone conversation with someone about Thanksgiving plans while Steve Martin remains waiting in line staring at her to finish up. McClurg came up with the idea to speak with her sister about who was going to make what adding "You know I can't cook!". Hughes asked her how she came up with those lines so quickly and she replied that, like his scripts, she just drew it from her own life. McClurg claims to this day that random people ask her to tell them they're fucked.

November 25, 1992 -
Neil Jordan's controversial (for the time) thriller, The Crying Game, starring Stephen Rea, Miranda Richardson, Jaye Davidson, and Forest Whitaker, went into limited release in the US on this date.

Producer Stephen Woolley owned a repertory cinema in London called the Scala. When the film ran into funding issues Woolley borrowed money from the Scala to keep the production afloat.

Another moment of edifying culture -

Today in History:
November 25, 2348 BC -
According to Biblical scholars, a powerful rain storm began on this date. It rained an inch every ten seconds. Imagine that. An inch every ten seconds. The sheer volume and velocity of the deluge, comparable to rapid-fire artillery, ought to have been enough to kill every living thing on the planet in seconds, and yet it reportedly continued at this rate for a full 960 hours.

The only human survivors were a crotchety six-hundred-year-old man and his family. Fortunately, these sturdy souls had had the foresight to gather up two to seven specimens of every species on the planet (excepting, one assumes, the undaunted creatures of the sea) and load them onto a wooden boat before the storm began.

It may not sound like much, put like that, but considering the far-flung distribution of all the various creatures of the earth, and the difficulty of tracking down, say, all the varieties of paramecium without the benefit of a microscope, or sustaining desert flora on a water-logged ship, it was a considerable accomplishment.

I applaud the foresight, initiative, and ambition displayed by Noah and his family, but remain a little wary of the person or persons behind all that rain.

November 25, 1867 -
I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a fiend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize - George Bernard Shaw

A patent was granted to Alfred Nobel for dynamite on this date.

To quote Big Jim McBob and Billy Sol Hurok, "May the Lord take a liking to you and blow you up real good!!!"

November 25, 1914 -
Joe DiMaggio was born on this date. In addition to leading the New York Yankees to ten World Series championships, Joe DiMaggio also got to marry Marilyn Monroe.

Be grateful for role models.

November 25, 1920 -
Contrary to popular belief, Macy's didn't host the first Thanksgiving Day parade (Macy's held their first parade in 1924, tied for second in the nation with the J.L. Hudson's Dept. store Thanksgiving Day Parade in Detroit) - that honor goes to their longtime (and now defunct) rival Gimbel Brothers (Gimbels), in Philadelphia, which started the tradition on this date.

The first parade featured 50 costumed store employees leading a fireman dressed as Santa to the store on Eighth and Market Streets. Santa Claus, upon reaching Gimbels, would scale a fire truck ladder to the store’s eighth floor, conveniently the home of Gimbels Toyland themed dept.

November 25, 1944 -
On this date, a carrier pigeon Paddy was decorated for his effort in the war against Nazi Germany. In the service of Royal Air Force, Paddy had achieved to get a message from Normandy to England in the fastest crossing of the English Channel: 4 hours and 50 minutes.

When receiving his Order of Merit Paddy was described as "exceptionally intelligent". Unfortunately for Paddy and his compatriots, wartime rationing was still on-going and they were broasted and served at a White House holiday luncheon soon therefafter.

November 25, 1963 -
The flag draped coffin containing the purported remains of the man, many Americans believed to have been John F. Kennedy was buried at Arlington National Cemetery. And on November 29, President Lyndon Baines Johnson appointed Chief Justice Earl Warren the head of a commission to investigate the alleged assassination of the person believed to have been John F. Kennedy.

Once again, be grateful the CIA, the Cuban exile community, the Rosicrucians, extraterrestrials, and the Children's Television Workshop don't give a damn about you.

November 25, 1970 -
Japanese playwright, poet, novelist, nationalist, body building enthusiast and patron of transvestite bars, Yukio Mishima (Kimitake Hiraoka) committed seppuku (self disembowelment) after an aborted coup attempt in Japan on this date.

He had authored over 100 works and was deemed by Life magazine the "Japanese Hemmingway".

One has to ask themselves - why is perfect purity only possible when you turn your life into a line of poetry written with a splash of blood. (I don't know, maybe you don't ask yourself these type of questions.)

On November 25, 1977, Greece announced the discovery of the tomb of King Philip II, the father of Alexander the Great.

On November 26, 1922, archaeologists Lord Carnarvon and Howard Carter opened the tomb of Egypt’s King Tutankhamen.

Be grateful that the high point of your job isn’t digging up people who’ve been dead for thousands of years.

November 25, 1987 -
Fawn Hall, Oliver North's assistant, removes documents from sealed National Security Council offices inside the White House by hiding them inside her skirt, causing President Ronald Reagan to form a task force which eventually put both North and Hall on trial.

Another true American Patriot. Be grateful you're not called upon to assist your boss by shoving stuff in your panties.

And so it goes

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

shoving stuff in your panties indeed