Sunday, June 15, 2014

Anyone can be a father, but it takes a lot to be a daddy.

I hope all of you fathers, stepfathers, fathers to be, mothers who are the fathers to their kids and fathers (but you don't know it) have a great Father's Day today.

Remember that when your kids tell you that you're the world's greatest dad, their frame of reference is limited

Coincidentally, today is National Lobster day  (I'll be celebrating)- I'm not sure if the holiday is celebrating this crustacean for its' longevity or its' delicious taste.

Don't forget the drawn butter

June 15, 1960 -
The Apartment
, starring Jack Lemmon and Shirley MacLaine, opened in New York on this date. This is the film Billy Wilder completed after his smash hit Some Like It Hot.

This was the last B&W movie to win Best Picture at The Academy Awards until The Artist . Schindler's List which won in 1994 was not completely B&W as some scenes were in color, like the girl in the red and the candle at the beginning.

June 15, 1967 -
The WWII adventure film, The Dirty Dozen, premiered on this date.

Production on the film ran for so long that Jim Brown was in danger of missing training camp for the up-coming 1967-68 football season. As training camp and the NFL season approached, the NFL threatened to fine and suspend Brown if he did not leave filming and report to camp immediately. Not one to take threats, Brown simply held a press conference to announce his retirement from football. At the time of his retirement, Brown was considered to be one of the best in the game and even today is considered to be one of the NFL's all-time greats.

June 15, 1990 -
Warren Beatty's
take on the comic strip detective, Dick Tracy, opened on this date.

Given how bad the reviews of the film were, surprisingly, this was Warren Beatty's highest-grossing film.

June 15, 1994 -
32nd animated feature, The Lion King, opened in limited release in the US on this date.

The team working on the movie was supposedly Disney's "team B", who were "kept busy" while "team A" worked on Pocahontas, on which the production had much higher hopes. To date The Lion King still holds the record for being the highest grossing traditionally animated film in history.

Today in History:
June 15, 1215
King John was forced by all the English Barons to sign the Magna Carta, which asserted the supremacy of the law over the king, at Runnymede, England on this date.

The Magna Carta (the Great Charter) was adopted and sealed by the King at Runnymede, England, granting his barons more liberty.

June 15, 1330 -
Please take notes, this will be on the test:

King Edward III was a famous English king, celebrated for his invention of manners and discovery of the economy. He played tennis, and once famously rebuked the King of France for having sent him his balls in a box.

King Edward established the Order of the Garter because he was what English nobles referred to as a "leg man." (It was he who also famously remarked, Honi soit qui mal y pense, or Honey, show us some cheesecake.)

King Edward had many sons, one of whom was born on June 15, 1330. This son he named Prince Edward. Though white at birth, he eventually became England's first Black Prince.

Prince Edward eventually married Joan of Kent. In her youth, Joan had been known as the Fairly Made because she was so fat; in later years she was referred to as Chubster and Lardass, though seldom to her face.

At the age of sixteen, Prince Edward and his father the king led the English against the French at Crecy, in order to start the 100 years war. There were many more French than English, but the English had the advantage of the Long Boa. The French were powerless against this innovation. Ten years later, the English and French took the field again, this time at Poitiers. The French had learned from experience, and tried to counter the English Long Boa with their own Very Large Scarf. They failed. The English took France's King John prisoner and ransomed him for half a million pounds (250 tons). Prince Edward was kind to the French king, however, and prayed with him, which proved that the apple had not fallen far from the tree. (Edward was also a legman.)

By now he had become the Black Prince.

In recognition of his prowess, the Black Prince was made the ruler of Aquitaine in 1362. When some of the French rebelled at Limoges in 1370, he had all 3000 inhabitants killed. This resulted in peace. The Black Prince died before he could succeed to the throne, thereby losing the opportunity to become England's first Black King.

Edward and Joan had two children. One was Edward, who died in infancy and was therefore ineligible to be king. The other was Richard, also known as Richard II, who succeeded to the throne only to abdicate in favor of Henry IV, Part 1. Following Henry IV Parts 1 and 2 came Henry V, then Henry VI parts 1, 2 and 3, and then finally Richard III.

They kept William Shakespeare busy for many years.

June 15, 1409 -
Petros Philargos
was elected Pope Alexander V by the Council of Pisa. This poses a certain amount of difficulty and increased the amount of Papal Bull, as there already is a Pope in Rome, Gregory XII, and another in Avignon, Benedict XII. Ultimately, none of the three is willing to step down, leading the Church into a double schism.

This made papal dispensations a drug on the market.

On June 15, 1520, Pope Leo X (no relation to Malcolm or the Generation) excommunicated Martin Luther with a papal bull.

Pope Leo X is famous for his use of bulls, although not quite as famous (and we know it's not true) as Catherine the Great for her use of horses.

Dr. Jean-Baptiste Denys, the personal physician to Louis XIV, performed the first blood transfusion in history on June 15,1667. He performed the transfusion on a fifteen year old boy, using blood from a sheep.

The experiment was considered a success (the boy died), although it was clearly a disappointment if you were rooting for the sheep.

June 15, 1752 -
Benjamin Franklin and his son tested the relationship between electricity and lightning by flying a kite in a thunder storm on this date. There is no record on how much the Franklins drank earlier that day.

This now proved the famous theory that lightning is some powerful sh*t.

June 15, 1785 -
Jean-François Pilâtre de Rozier died during an attempted crossing of the English Channel when his balloon, a combination hydrogen and hot air balloon, exploded on this date.

Thus, he and his companion, Pierre Romain, became the first known victims of an air crash. The term "pilot" is sometimes erroneously thought to derive from his first name, Pilatre.

The General Slocum worked as a passenger ship, taking people on excursions around New York City. On June 15, 1904, the ship had been chartered for $350 by the St. Mark's Evangelical Lutheran Church in the German district Little Germany, Manhattan. This was an annual rite for the group, which had made the trip for 17 consecutive years. Over 1,300 passengers, mostly women and children, boarded the General Slocum. It was to sail up the East River and then eastward across Long Island Sound to Locust Grove, a picnic site in Eatons Neck, Long Island. It caught fire and burned to the water line in New York's East River.

More than 1,000 people died in the accident, making it New York City's worst loss-of-life disaster until the September 11, 2001 attacks.

June 15, 1955 -
The Eisenhower administration stages the first annual OPAL exercise. In the Operation Alert drill, air raid sirens blare across America to assess our preparations for a nuclear attack.

Duck and cover, people.

And so it goes.

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