May I make a suggestion?

Administrative Professionals Day, former known as Secretaries Day, always falls on the last week of April. I believe it should occur on June 9th (read on.)

June 9, 68 -
Rather than suffer a Senate-imposed death by flogging, Nero implores his secretary Epaphroditus to slit his throat. The freedman complies, giving the condemned emperor a quick death, just as centurions arrive at the villa to haul him away.





You certainly can't get help like that anymore from your company's secretarial pool.


Today in History:
June 9, 1870 -
Charles Dickens dropped dead at his chair at the dinner table in his home in London. He died of a stroke, or apoplexy as it was called then.

He was 58 years old. In the months before he died, he must have already suffered a stroke—he spoke in his letters of weakness and deadness on the left side and of not being able to pick up things with his left hand.



Being the ever prolific writer, Mr. Dickens still manages to write three more short stories, a humorous monograph and a recipe for rum punch while on the way to his burial.


June 9, 1930 -
Jake Lingle, a reporter for the Chicago Tribune, is shot dead gangland-style at the Illinois Central train station underpass, during rush hour. Dozens of people witness the murder, and the Leo Vincent Brothers are caught four months later after an intensive manhunt.



Lingle was allegedly killed over a $100,000 gambling debt owed to Al Capone.

I wonder what the vig was on that kind of debt?


June 9, 1934 -
Seventy five years ago today, an American legend made his first appearance on the silver screen. Since then, he has appeared in over 450 films in more than 200 languages, held lead roles in dozens of television serials and hundreds of specials, and has been featured in books and magazines in every language. He has done all of this without wearing pants.



He is, of course, the world's favorite lazy, hot-headed, bare-assed mallard: Donald Duck.


June 9, 1947 -
Another of his studio mangled features, Orson Welles' The Lady from Shanghai was released on this date.



Studio Boss Harry Cohn, famously offered anyone $1000.00 if they could explain to him the plot of the movie after an initial screening.

June 9, 1954
In the 'wish I had said that' catagory - Joseph Welch asks Sen Joseph McCarthy 'Have you no sense of decency, sir?' during Senate-Army hearings.



Sometimes the brain works fast enough to say the perfect thing.


June 9, 1980 -
In the midst of a cocaine binge, comedian Richard Pryor attempts suicide by dousing himself with rum and setting it ablaze. The self-immolation attempt goes haywire when the flaming man leaps from his apartment window and runs down the street, screaming in agony.



Pryor barely survives the incident, and only after six weeks of intensive care and three skin graft surgeries.


June 9, 1992 -
Entertainer Ben Vereen was critically injured when he was struck by a van while walking along the Pacific Coast Highway near Malibu, California. The driver, producer/composer David Foster, was not charged. Some hours earlier, Vereen had run into a tree while driving his own car. He blames that mishap for the later accident. He said, "I had hit my head on the steering wheel but felt fine. Later that evening as I was walking in Malibu, I had [a] stroke as a result of that accident." Vereen says he then stumbled into the roadway and was hit by the van.



Talk about having a lousy day...


And so it goes.