Thursday, February 9, 2017

I spoke too soon

The other day I made a joke about the Snow Apocalypses that weather forecasters like to warn us about during the second half of Winter in the Northeast.

And here it apparently is!

In other news - There's an excess of celebrations today:

Today is the 13th day of the Lunar New Year. All of the festival food should probably be done by now. Most people just want to eat something simple on this day. Some people eat vegetarian foods to cleanse their digestive system (remember yesterday was Diarrhea day.) This day is dedicated to the General Guan Yu.

Guan Yu was born in the Three Kingdom period, (211-263 AD), after late Han Dynasty and is considered the greatest general in Chinese history. He represents loyalty, strength, truth, and justice. According to history, he was tricked by the enemy and was beheaded on this date. Some people will visit the temple of General Guan to pray for safety and money luck. Some treat General Guan as a God of Wealth. This is because General Guan won hundreds of battles and business people want to won the battle on the business deals.

It case you haven't done so yet, I can think of no better way for you to have luck today than sending me a small red envelope filled with cash.

It is Toothache Day,

Bathtub Day and

Bagels and Lox Day today.

I'm not quite sure why?

February 9, 1933 -
Based on the Mae West play Diamond Lil, She Done Him Wrong, opened in general release on this date. This was one of the last films to be made before the introduction of the Production Code.

Mae West was signed by Paramount in 1931 to make a film adaptation of her stage play. They then spent the next two years trying to figure out a way of getting the material past the censors. The battle over Diamond Lil led to the head of the Production Board, James Wingate, quitting and being replaced by the much more hardline Joseph Breen who was prompted to set up a fairly stringent and moral Production Code.

February 9, 1971 -
All in the Family aired what TV scholars believe to be the first positive portrayal of a gay issue on American television on this date.

Guest stars Anthony Geary and Philip Carey both went on to play long running roles on popular ABC Soap Operas. Geary as Luke Spencer on General Hospital, and Carey as Asa Buchannan on One Life to Live.

February 9, 1976 -
Paul Simon's song, 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover, hits number 1 on this date.

Paul Simon has never gotten around to listing the other ways to leave but poking around the internet, I have discovered the other 45 ways:

6. Post her nude pics, Dick.
7. Delete him from your phone, Simone.
8. Block his digits, Bridget.
9. Keep him in the dark, Mark.
10. Keep blowing her off, Kristoph.
11. Just have the chat, Pat.
12. Make her break up with you, Stu.
13. Stop having sex with her, Jessic… er.
14. Give him an ultimatum, Tatum.
15. Change your address, Jess.
16. Tell the whole truth, Ruth.
17. Just get up and leave, Steve.
18. Tell her you’ve “grown apart,” Bart.
19. Tell him “It’s not you, it’s me,” Bree.
20. Don’t give him a second chance, Lance.
21. In a public place, Chase.
22. Tell her “we’re turning into our parents,” Clarence.
23. Get back together with your ex, Lex.
24. Let yourself be the villain, Dylan.
25. Throw dishes and yell, Belle.
26. Start being mean, Gene.
27. Get really quiet, Wyatt.
28. Give up the fight, Dwight.
29. Get caught in the act, Jack.
30. Forget her birthday again, Glenn.
31. Just cut him loose, Bruce.
32. Pretend you didn’t know you were supposed to be “together,” Heather.
33. Tell her you’re married, Larry.
34. Say “It’s moving too fast,” Cass.
35. Tell him you “don’t like rules,” Jules.
36. Tell her you “don’t like labels,” Mabel.
37. Just disappear, Greer.
38.Lose your phone,” Joan.
39. Text “We need to talk,” Brock.
40. Just be too busy, Lizzy.
41. Say you “need space,” Grace.
42. Say, “we’re just taking a break,” Jake.
43. Say, “I think I might be gay,” Ray.
44. Say, “I think I might be straight,” Nate.
45. Admit to your affair, Blair.
46. Get a restraining order, Porter.
47. Tell her “It’s me or the drinkin,” Lincoln.
48. Fly off the handle, Randall.
49. Blame everything on him, Tim.
50. Say “I don’t deserve you,” Drew

Next up - 50 ways to Delouse your Liver or 50 ways to lose your luggage

February 9, 1997 -
The Fox cartoon series The Simpsons became the longest-running animated series in cartoon history when it aired it's 167th episode on this date.

"I can't believe we've been annoying people for this long," executive producer and show creator Matt Groening told the Associated Press. The show is still going 20 years later

Today in History -
On February 9, 772, Adrian I was elected pope. His election was won largely due to strong Frank support. (This Gaelic support system was the precursor to French support, which remains anything but Frank.)

Adrian worked closely with Charlemagne, also known as Carolus Magnus (Big Chuck), the inventor of France.

So now you know.

William Henry Harrison was born on February 9, 1773. Mr. Harrison was the Ninth president of the United States.

He died after 32 days in office, although historians are quick to point out that it has never been adequately proven that he was alive prior to his inauguration.

February 9, 1825 -
John Quincy Adams became the Sixth U.S. President, despite losing the popular vote.  Adams was elected by the House of Representatives on this date after the Electoral College could not arrive at a majority.

His appointment was largely due to the influence of Henry Clay (then Speaker of the House and also a candidate for the presidency in 1824), whom Adams later appointed as his Secretary of State.

The Great Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoyevsky died on February 9, 1881.

He died of natural causes in Moscow, and over 40,000 mourners turned out for his funeral but what the hell do you care, you didn't read him anyway.

February 9, 1894 -
Chocoholics everywhere rejoice!

Milton Hershey founded the Hershey Chocolate Company (just in time for Valentine's Day) and began experimenting with a process mastered by the Swiss - mixing milk with chocolate on this date.

February 9, 1909 -
The first federal law prohibiting the importation of opium was enacted, The Opium Exclusion Act of 1909 on this date.

It is aimed not particularly at the ravages the drug was having on American society but as a discriminatory act against  the Chinese (note: white people weren't using opium in large quantities at the time.)

February 9, 1942 -
The former French cruise ship Normandie, launched in 1935, burned in New York Harbor during its conversion to an Allied trip transport ship on this date.

It was once regarded as most elegant ocean liner ever built. In 1947, the remaining wreckage was cut up for scrap.

February 9, 1950 -
Senator Joseph McCarthy announced he has a list of 205 State Department employees who were Communist Party members on this date.

He did not mention that J. Edgar Hoover liked to wear a bustier and leather pumps.

February 9, 1964 -
The Beatles made their first live American television appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show on this date. Approximately 74 million viewers (about half of the American population) watched the group perform on the show.

I wonder if late at night, they can still hear the ghost of those little girls screaming inside the Ed Sullivan Theatre.

And so it goes.


Today we're going bigly for who is going to be number two, behind America:

It is only coincidental that ACME already has a Martian global monopoly on most products.

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