But that has nothing to do with the fact that it's Edward Lear's birthday.
It's National Limerick Day today.
Please keep all those unfortunate bucket owners from Nantucket in your thoughts today.
Happy Mother's Day to all of you. Remember, your mom's maternity clothes were much less embarrassing than Kim Kardashian's are.
May 12, 1937 -
George Denis Patrick Carlin stand-up comedian, social critic, prolific pot smoker, actor and author was born on this date.
In 2004, Carlin placed second on the Comedy Central list of the 100 greatest stand-up comedians of all time, ahead of Lenny Bruce and behind Richard Pryor (not a bad seating arrangement.)
Today in History:
May 12, 1797 -
Following Napoleon's conquest of Venice, Ludovico Manin reluctantly steps down as its last Doge on this date.
So now you know, try working that into a conversation.
May 12, 1932 -
Delivery truck driver William Allen pulled his truck to the side of a road about 4.5 miles from the Lindbergh home. He went to a grove of trees to relieve himself, and there he discovered the badly decomposed body of the Lindbergh Baby.
There were signs that the body had been chewed on by various animals as well as indications that someone had made an attempt to hastily bury the body.
These kinds of stories make you want to be a piss bottle man.
May 12, 1967 -
At Queen Elizabeth Hall, England, Pink Floyd stages the first-ever quadraphonic rock concert on this date. Included in their set was their first UK hit, Arnold Layne.
Please kids, don't be like Syd, time your drugs correctly.
May 12, 1971 -
Tor Johnson died of congestive heart failure at the age of 67 in San Fernando, California, on this date.
The man who once wrestled under the name "The Super Swedish Angel" leaves behind a legacy of B-movie acting roles, most famously as the bald zombie in Ed Wood's masterpiece Plan 9 from Outer Space.
May 12, 1982-
A mentally unbalanced priest named Juan Fernandez Krohn attempted to stab Pope John Paul II with a bayonet, but was overpowered before he could do any damage.
When asked later, Krohn said that the pope was an "agent of Moscow" and had to be killed.
And so it goes.