I don't remember this one on Schoolhouse Rock

Last week, the Jimmy Kimmel Show presents another Kimmel Kartoon - You're Screwed



Kids remember, underage drinking is bad


July 15 1956 -
Every man its prisoner... every woman its slave!

Although not in the same league as Plan 9 from Outer Space, It Conquered the World was released upon an unsuspecting public on this date.



Although usually referred to as a being a "cucumber" or another vegetable by fans, "Beluah" is actually supposed to be a fungus.  Originally, "Beluah" was built as a squat, flat-topped creature, but when it turned out not to be imposing enough - and to actually be shorter than leading lady Beverly Garland - a tapering conical top was added to it.


July 15, 1998 -
The Farrelly Brothers career saving romantic comedy, There's Something About Mary premiered on this date.



Dropping Ted on the stretcher wasn't scripted. When it happened, they cut to make sure Ben Stiller was okay and then thought it was so funny they left it in.


Today in History:
July 15, 1606 -
Rembrandt van Rijn was born in Leiden, Holland, on this date.

His father was a miller and his mother was a stay-at-home mom.



He is best known for his mastery of chiaroscuro and impasto, but his calamari was nothing to sneeze at.


July 15, 1799 -
The Rosetta Stone is an Ancient Egyptian artifact which was instrumental in advancing modern understanding of hieroglyphic writing. The stone is a Ptolemaic era stele with carved text. The text is made up of three translations of a single passage, written in two Egyptian language scripts (hieroglyphic and Demotic), and in classical Greek.



It was created in 196 BC, discovered by the Napoleonic expeditionary forces in 1799 at Rashid (a harbour on the Mediterranean coast in Egypt which the French referred to Rosetta) and contributed greatly to the decipherment of the principles of hieroglyphic writing in 1822 by the British polymath Thomas Young and the French scholar Jean-François Champollion.

Feel free to impress your friends with this bit of knowledge.


July 15, 1857 -
During an uprising, the group of British women and children being held by rebels in Chawnpore, India are cut to pieces with knives and hatchets. Then their remains are tossed into a well.



When British forces finally retake Chawnpore, the captured rebels are taken back to the house where the slaughter took place. Then they are forced to lick the floors clean, after which they are hanged.

I hate to think what the penalty was for not rewinding video tapes.


July 15 1864 -
A train containing hundreds of Confederate prisoners passing through Shohola, PA crashes head on with a coal train on this date.

The trains were off schedule because of an escape attempt. 74 people, mostly prisoners, died.


July 15, 1869 -
During war with Prussia, French ruler Napoleon III commissions Hippolye Mege Mouries to find a butter substitute. A patent for margarine was issued on this date, it being based on beef fat instead of milk fat.

He called it Margarine (but you can call it Oleo) because the French word for pearl was margarite and he apparently had difficulty distinguishing butter from pearls -



a handicap that goes a long way toward explaining his many divorces.



But even with the tactically superior spread, the war is still lost.


July 15, 1904 -
A small town Russian alcoholic doctor quietly succumbed to consumption, while in another room, his relatives sat around the house and wistfully bemoaned the lost opportunities of their lives. An old family retainer served tea to the unknowning mourners. Off in the distance, the guitar string of a peasant guitar breaks, all on this date.



Anton Pavlovich Chekhov, died on this date but not as described above. As he lay dying of tuberculosis, in a German Spa, Chekhov called out for his doctor. The doctor examined him and prescribed him a glass of champagne. Chekhov finished his glass, commented on the taste, lay back down and died.




And so it goes