It's Honest Abe's Birthday

Go split a log in his honor

Here's your Today In History:




On February 12, 1554, The sixteen year old Lady Jane Grey, puppet Queen of England for nine days, beheaded in the Tower of London. Questions arose as to where to bury this semi-queen, until it was decided to place her among the beheaded former wives of Henry VIII.




Adolf Frederick was King of Sweden until he died of digestion problems on February 12, 1771 after having consumed a meal consisting of lobster, caviar, sour cabbage, smoked herring and champagne, which was topped off with 14 servings of his favorite dessert: semla (a hot cross bun filled with cream) served in a bowl of hot milk. He is thus remembered by Swedish schoolchildren as "the king who ate himself to death." So remember - push away from the dessert tray, folks.




February 12, 1789
Ethan Allen dies in a drunken sleigh accident while crossing the frozen Lake Champlain, reminiscing with friends and rye. Much of the circumstance remains a mystery. The Spirit of Ethan Allen is Lake Champlain's largest cruise ship. So kids remember, if you're lucky and you die while drunkenly crossing a Great Lake, you too can get a cruise ship or a line of furniture named after you.




Immanuel Kant, a real pissant, died on February 12, 1804. His last words were reportedly "It is good." This is hard to believe, since Kant did not speak English.




On February 12, 1894, Hans von Bulow died, (yes, Klaus is related to him). He was a popular pianist and composer, and the husband of composer Franz Liszt's daughter, Cosima, who screwed around behind Hans's back and ultimately left him for Richard Wagner, (more about him tomorrow)




Emperor Pu Yi of China's Manchu dynasty abdicated on February 12, 1912, allowing the establishment of a provisional republic under Sun Yat-sen, eventually causing Red China.




February 12,1967
Police in London arrest Keith Richards, Mick Jagger, and Marianne Faithful after they discover amphetamine pills, cannabis resin, and Marianne scandalously naked but for a fur rug. The two Rolling Stones received jail sentences which were successfully appealed. Questions still persist - where exactly was that Mars Bar anyway?







And so it goes.