Read the ramblings of Dr. Caligari. Hopefully you will find that Time does wound all heels.
You no longer need to be sad that nowadays there is so little useless information.
January 31, 1921 John G. Agar, American's greatest B movie actor, first husband of Shirley Temple and owner of the world's largest King Kong Statue, was born on this day.
Sometimes, it's just greay to be alive.
Here is your Today in History -
January 31, 1940 - The first monthly retirement check was issued to Ida May Fuller of Ludlow, Vermont, in the amount of $22.54. Miss Fuller, a Legal Secretary, retired in November 1939. She started collecting benefits in January 1940 at age 65 and lived to be 100 years old, dying in 1975.
Ida May Fuller worked for three years under the Social Security program. The accumulated taxes on her salary during those three years were a total of $24.75. Her initial monthly check was $22.54. During her lifetime she collected a total of $22,888.92 in Social Security benefits.
January 31, 1945 - Private Eddie Slovik is the first U.S. soldier to be shot for desertion since the Civil War.
January 31, 1950 - President Truman gives the go-ahead for the development of Edward Teller's hydrogen bomb.
Explorer-I, officially Satellite 1958 Alpha (and sometimes referred to as Explorer 1), was the first Earth satellite of the United States, having been launched at 10:48 pm EST on January 31, 1958, as part of the United States program for the International Geophysical Year. The satellite was launched from LC-26 at Cape Canaveral Air Force Station in Florida onboard a Juno I rocket.
Electrical power was provided by mercury chemical batteries that made up approximately 40 percent of the payload weight. These provided power that operated the high power transmitter for 31 days and the low-power transmitter for 105 days.
January 31, 1961 - The United States sends its first space monkey into space, Ham the chimpanzee. His Mercury/Redstone 2 achieves an altitude of 158 miles. Ham's capsule splashed down in the Atlantic Ocean and was recovered by a rescue ship later that day.
After the flight, Ham lived for 17 years in the National Zoo in Washington D.C., then at the North Carolina Zoo before dying at the age of 27 on January 19, 1983. Ham appeared repeatedly on television, as well as on film with Evel Knievel. Truly, a great way to honor this space pioneer - appear with Evel Knievel.
January 31, 1966 -
The Soviet Union launches the unmanned Luna 9 spacecraft as part of the Luna program. Three days later, on February 3, 1966 the Luna 9 spacecraft was the first spacecraft to achieve a lunar soft landing and to transmit photographic data to Earth.
For unknown reasons, the pictures from Luna 9 were not released immediately by the Soviet authorities.
After weeks of shocking twists and turns, the impeachment of Rod Blagojevich offered no surprises at all. He can take some small comfort that Illinois lawmakers appear not to know the origins of the word.
Persian traders arrived in ancient Roman ports with a fruit no Roman citizen had ever seen before, and the wildly popular fruit was simply called a "Persian"—in Latin, a "persicum." Later, when France was invented by a lot of Romans who’d been chased out of Rome by the Germans who’d been squeezed out of Germany by the Hungarians who’d... well, anyway, they translated "persicum" into "peche," which sounded Frencher. The English subsequently pronounced "peche" as "peach" just to get a rise out of the French. That’s where we get "peach."
Now here’s the tricky part: prior to being decapitated at the outset of the French Revolution, King Louis XVI (pronounced "zivvy") was seized by a mob of wild-eyed, tricote-wearing Frenchmen, who stripped the king, pinned him down, and jammed half a dozen "peches" up his royal rectum. In his classic 1790 treatise, "Reflections on the Chopping Off of People’s Heads," British statesman and philosopher Edmund Burke observed that, "prior to having his head so elegantly disassociated from his shoulders, the late French king was impeached by the people."
Lucky for Rod, peaches were not on sale this week.
January 30, 1969 At a free concert at their Apple corporate headquarters in London, The Beatles made their last-ever public appearance as a group.
Their performance of Get Back was filmed for the movie Let It Be. Kids, this was 40 years ago.
Today in History: January 30, 1649 Once again, history proves that it's not always good to be the king (or apparently the man who overthrows him either). Charles I was your average inbred near dwarf royalty that much of Europe was popping out at the time. He is listed in the Guinness Book of Records as the nation's shortest king. He married another inbred royal princess (Princess Henrietta Maria of France) and that would have been that. Unfortunately for him, two issues got in his way - his wife was Catholic and after much tsuris, England was in a Protestant mood.
Also, Charles had picked up the nasty habit of believe in the Divine right of the Monarchy. Parliament was feeling it oats and would have none of it and this lead to the English Civil War. Rather than the Blue and the Grey, England had the Roundheads and the Cavaliers (it really doesn't matter who was who.)
Charles and his supported were defeated and Charles was put on a show trial for High Treason. Since Charles believed he had a Divine right to be King, he put up no defense. Parliament, wishing all the best to meet the Divine, convicted him of treason and ordered his execution.
When Charles was beheaded on 30 January 1649, it is reputed that he wore two shirts as to prevent the cold January weather causing any noticeable shivers that the crowd could have been mistaken for fear or weakness. He put his head on the block after saying a prayer and signaled the executioner when he was ready; he was then beheaded with one clean stroke.
It was common practice for the head of a traitor to be held up and exhibited to the crowd with the words "Behold the head of a traitor!"; although Charles' head was exhibited, the words were not used. In an unprecedented gesture, one of the revolutionary leaders, Oliver Cromwell, allowed the King's head to be sewn back on his body so the family could pay its respects. Charles was buried in private and at night on 7 February 1649, in the Henry VIII vault inside St George's Chapel in Windsor Castle.
This was Cromwell's big mistake.
Under Oliver Cromwell, England became a Repuplic and became Protectorate and ruled England until his death from malaria in 1658. He was succeeded as Lord Protector by his son Richard. Although Richard was not entirely without ability, he had no power base in either Parliament or the Army, and was forced to resign in the spring of 1659, bringing the Protectorate to an end. In the period immediately following his abdication, the head of the army, George Monck took power for less than a year, at which point, Parliament restored Charles II as king.
Now here's the kicker - in 1661, Oliver Cromwell's body was exhumed from Westminster Abbey, and was subjected to the ritual of a posthumous execution. Symbolically, this took place on January 30; the same date that Charles I had been executed. As Cromwell was quite dead at the time, he could put up a very weak defense at best. His body was hung in chains at Tyburn. Finally, his disinterred body was thrown into a pit, while his severed head was displayed on a pole outside Westminster Abbey until 1685. Afterward, the head changed hands several times, before eventually being buried in the grounds of Sidney Sussex College, Cambridge, in 1960.
January 30, 1835 - Andrew Jackson is the subject of the first recorded assassination attempt on a U.S. president. Jackson was crossing the Capitol Rotunda following the funeral of a Congressman when Richard Lawrence approached Jackson and fired two pistols, which both miraculously misfired. Jackson proceeded to beat the living daylights out of Lawrence with his cane, prompting his aides to restrain him.
As a result, Jackson's statue in the Capitol Rotunda is placed in front of the doorway in which the attempt occurred. Lawrence was later found to be mentally ill, having accused Jackson of preventing him from becoming King of England.
January 30, 1948 - Sometimes, it's not good to be the world's greatest advocate of non violence.
Mohandas K. Gandhi is assassinated by Hindu extremist Nathuram Godse on his way to morning prayers.
January 30, 1968 - North Vietnam launches the Tet Offensive, in which they suffer a defeat and 46,000 dead,
but shocks the complacent American television viewer who had been led to believe the war was won.
January 30, 1976 - George HW Bush becomes directory of the Central Intelligence Agency, a position which he holds until 1977. Perhaps he knows who killed Kennedy.
January 29, 1954 Oprah Gail Winfrey, the most influential woman in the world, already got a President of the United States for her birthday, must be experiencing a small let down looking at all of her other gifts.
January 29 1595 - "When he shall die, Take him and cut him out in little stars, And he will make the face of heaven so fine, That all the world will be in lobe with night, And pay no worship to the garish sun."
William Shakespeare's play Romeo and Juliet is probably first performed (unless it wasn't). I don't know, I wasn't there, were you?
It's Thomas Paine's birthday today. He was born in 1737.
You could commemorate the occasion by reading (or rereading) Common Sense. You could also commemorate the occasion by piercing an eyebrow or waxing your car or bikini area. I don't care, it was just a suggestion.
January 29, 1964 - Introducing us to "precious bodily fluids," and the rule about no fighting in the War room, Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb is released in the United States.
Nuclear annihilation will never be the same.
January 29, 1979 "I don't like Mondays. This livens up the day." -- Brenda Spencer fires repeatedly at the school across from her residence in San Diego, killing 2 and wounding 8 children, using the rifle her father had given her as a gift. The reason she gave inspired the Boomtown Rats song.
Serendipity is the effect by which one accidentally discovers something fortunate, especially while looking for something else entirely.
The word derives from an old Persian fairy tale and was coined by Horace Walpole on 28th of January 1754 in a letter he wrote to his friend Horace Mann (not the same man as the famed American educator).
This should not be confused with Synchronicity - which is an album by the Police (but that's another story).
January 28, 814 - First Reich Charlemagne German emperor, dies at the age of 71.
Though he had conquered much of Europe, his legacy was considerably reduced after his death from mismanagement and incompetence.
Coincidentally, The Siege of Paris, lasting from September 19, 1870 – January 28, 1871, ends, bringing about French defeat in the Franco-Prussian War and led to the establishment of the German Empire (Second Reich).
Due to a severe shortage of food, Parisians were forced to slaughter whatever animals at hand. Rats, dogs, cats, and horses were regular fare on restaurant menus.
* Consommé de Cheval au millet. (horse) * Brochettes de foie de Chien à la maître d'hôtel. (dog) * Emincé de rable de Chat. Sauce mayonnaise. (cat) * Epaules et filets de Chien braisés. Sauce aux tomates. (dog) * Civet de Chat aux Champignons. (cat) * Côtelettes de Chien aux petits pois. (dog) * Salmis de Rats. Sauce Robert. (rats) * Gigots de chien flanqués de ratons. Sauce poivrade. (rats) * Begonias au jus. (flowers) * Plum-pudding au rhum et à la Moelle de Cheval. (horse)
Even Castor and Pollux, the only pair of elephants in Paris, were not spared.
January 28, 1958 - Brooklyn Dodger catcher Roy Campanella is paralyzed in a car wreck.
January 28, 1958 - Those damn little toys that you step on in the middle of the night got their start today.
The Lego company patented their design of Lego bricks, still compatible with bricks produced today.
January 28, 1977 - Star of TV's "Chico and the Man" Freddie Prinze has a violent allergic reaction to a bullet to the brains at age 23.
January 28, 1978 - "Vampire of Sacramento" Richard Chase is arrested. Miscellaneous human organs are found in his refrigerator. He managed to kill six people, drinking the blood of two of his victims.
No fava beans or chianti were found in the apartment, though.
January 28, 1986 - Space Shuttle Challenger disintegrates 74 seconds into its flight, killing teacher Christa McAuliffe and the rest of the crew. Their capsule plunged intact into the ocean, pulverizing everyone on impact, making a rescue attempt difficult, if not impossible.
January 27, 1832 – Charles Lutwidge Dodgson, Anglican deacon, children's author, mathematician, and photographer (child pornographer) was born.
"I always call him Lewis Carroll Carroll, because he was the first Humbert Humbert. Have you seen those photographs of him with little girls? He would make arrangements with aunts and mothers to take the children out. He was never caught, except by one girl who wrote about him when she was much older."
-- V.V. Nabokov, interview, Dec. 1966 Vogue
January 27, 1901 - on January 21, 1901, the great maestro Joe Green (Giuseppe Verdi was merely his stage name) suffered a stroke while staying at the Grand Hotel et de Milan, in Milan. So revered was the composer that horses hooves were wrapped in blankets to muffle their noise as they passed the hotel where he rested.
Verdi gradually more feeble and died six days later, on this date.
Today in History:
January 27, 1756 - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Austrian musical genius, composer and fart joke lover, whose works included The Marriage of Figaro and The Magic Flute, was born on this date.
January 27, 1859 - Kaiser Wilhelm II, (Queen Victoria's first grandchild and first cousin to both King George V and Tsar Nicholas II) emperor who ruled Germany during World War I but was forced to abdicate in 1918, was born on this date.
January 27, 1900 - Hyman Rickover, American admiral who is considered the "Father of the Atomic Submarine", was born on this date. Creating a detail-focused pursuit of excellence to a degree previously unknown, Rickover redirected the United States Navy’s ship propulsion, quality control, personnel selection, and training and education, and has had far reaching effects on the defense establishment and the civilian nuclear energy field.
Jan 27 1967 - A launchpad flash fire in the Apollo I capsule kills the astronauts Gus Grissom, Edward H White, and Roger B Chaffee, at Cape Canaveral.
Jan 27 1992 - Candidate Bill Clinton and Gennifer Flowers mutually accuse each other of lying about whether or not they had a 12 year affair.
Jan 27 1992 - Prostitute Aileen Wuornos found guilty after she killed seven "johns", often leaving cum-filled condoms near their bodies.
She claimed self defense but is still sentenced to death. Oddly, prosecutors had arranged movie deals before an arrest had even been made.
Happy Chinese New Years Day - It's the Year of the Ox. The Ox is the sign of prosperity through fortitude and hard work. This powerful sign is a born leader, being quite dependable and possessing an innate ability to achieve great things. They tend, however, to be eccentric, and bigoted, and they anger easily. They have fierce tempers and although they speak little, when they do they are quite eloquent. That being said, such people are dependable, calm, and modest. Like their animal namesake, the Ox is unswervingly patient, tireless in their work, and capable of enduring any amount of hardship without complaint.
The first day of the New Year is for the welcoming of the deities of the heavens and earth. Many people, especially Buddhists, abstain from meat consumption on the first day because it is believed that this will ensure longevity for them. Some consider lighting fires and using knives to be bad luck on New Year's Day, so all food to be consumed is cooked the day before. Also, the first day of Chinese New Year is a time when families visit the oldest and most senior members of their extended family, usually their parents, grandparents or great-grandparents.
Kung Hei Fat Choi
January 26 is Republic Day (Poorna Swaraj) in India and dancers from all over the nation gather in New Delhi every year on this day to dance in the huge National Arena and all along a five mile parade route. On January 26, 1979, "Le Freak" was on the top of the American charts.
It's nice to think there's a connection.
Today in History:
January 26, 1955 Edward Lodewijk Van Halen, lead guitarist, co-founder of Van Halen and cancer survivor.
Even though he has lost 1/3 of his tongue to oral cancer, this jerk still smokes. Bad rock star.
January 26, 1958 - Ellen DeGeneres, actress, comedian and Cover Girl spokesmodel, was born on this date.
January 26, 1962 - Mafia boss Lucky Luciano dead of natural causes at the Naples airport. On the day of his fatal heart attack, Luciano had plans to sell the rights of his life's story to a movie maker. Luciano dropped dead as he was about to shake hands. The Mob disliked the idea and had tried unsuccessfully to change his mind. It has been hypothesized that Luciano's heart attack was a result of poisoning by the Mafia.
He was buried in St. John's Cemetery in Queens, New York after a federal court ruled his burial on United States soil could not be blocked on the grounds that a corpse is not a citizen of any country and is therefore not subject to immigration control or deportation laws.
January 26, 1979 - Dukes of Hazzard premiere, titled "One Armed Bandits". A shipment of slot machines is hijacked.
High comedy indeed.
January 26,1979 - 70-year-old multibillionaire Nelson Rockefeller is stricken by a massive heart attack while "giving dictation" to his 27-year-old research assistant, Megan Marshak. Some time after that event, Marshack had called her friend, news reporter Ponchitta Pierce, to the townhouse and it was Pierce who phoned 911 approximately an hour after the heart attack. Much speculation went on in the press regarding a personal relationship between Rockefeller and Marshack. Rockefeller's will leaves Marshak $50,000 and the deed to a Manhattan townhouse.
January 26, 1984 - Michael Jackson's hair is ignited by a magnesium flash bomb at Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles during the filming of a Pepsi television commercial, causing third-degree scalp burns.
It is later reveals that unscrupulous doctors prescribe a full regiment of pedophilia to ease the singers wounds.
January 26, 1998 - U.S. President Bill Clinton denies, on television, having had "sexual relations" with former White House intern Monica Lewinsky.
And sometimes, a blowjob is just a blowjob.
January 26, 1996 - Insane madman millionaire John E. du Pont shoots Olympic wrestler David Schultz three times, killing him. A two day police standoff follows at the Foxcatcher estate and wrestling compound, with SWAT teams biding their time under the assumption that du Pont, an expert marksman, possessed an arsenal at his disposal.
Nothing good every comes from greasing yourself up and rolling around a mat with another person in a unitard.
The "Burns Supper" is eaten all across Scotland each year on the anniversary of the national poet's birth. It consists of haggis and whiskey. It is customary for the host to read Burns's Ode to a Haggis at the dinner table, presumably as a diversionary tactic.
The haggis are a gentle breed of playful mammals indigenous to the Scottish highlands. They have never survived attempts at transplantation. They have been popular cuisine for as long as the British isles have been populated. Julius Caesar reflects in his memoirs that he tried to bring several thousand haggis back to Rome for breeding after his conquest of Brittania--a controversial decision that eventually led to civil war in the Roman Empire.
The ancient Picts of Ireland invaded and eventually settled Scotland in no small part because of their affinity for haggis. The ancient Celts migrated in the opposite direction to avoid it.
Haggis were traditionally trapped, killed, and prepared like most other small mammals. Toward the end of the eighteenth century, however, it became fashionable to drop living haggis, like lobster, into pots of boiling water.
This is because after boiling for half an hour the pelt peels off easily and can then be dried and used for in textiles. Haggis fur is especially popular in Scottish gloves, coats, and seat covers.
I would like to bring some attention to the terrible plight of the delicate and sweet-tempered Haggis, whose inoffensive lives are too often ended by being boiled alive at the hands of a boozy Scot.
In today's frigid atmosphere of political correctness, it is considered unfair to condemn the Scots for their grotesque maltreatment of these affectionate animals. To deplore their treatment of the haggis is to criticize their culture, and cultural criticism is an obscenity.
But Scottish culture? We're all grateful for whiskey, but is it enough to justify bagpipes and men in skirts? Has any other culture cried out so eloquently for condemnation?
Try looking into the trusting brown eyes of a haggis and explaining that it must be boiled alive and ceremonially dismembered for the sake of Scottish culture.
According to People against the Indefensible Treatment of Haggis, more than eight million haggis were "ranched" for this year's festivities. Over six million of these ranch-bred haggis, beside whom veal calves might well be considered pampered, were sold to Scots who will take them home, boiled them alive, then skin and dismember them. The nearly two million not sold will be tossed alive into commercial blenders, mixed with fresh cream, frozen, and later sold as the popular Scottish summer treat, Haggis Ice.
This horror must end. To help bring it home to Americans, I ask you to take a moment to reflect on our own Groundhog's Day. Each February 2, we honor the prognosticative skills of that curious little creature in a vast national celebration of pagan superstition. How many groundhogs die for this celebration? None. How many groundhog mothers are separated from their groundhog children in order to satisfy our national groundhog needs? None. How many grandfathers stand at the heads of their dinner tables, proudly presiding over the dismemberment of a steaming groundhog carcass?
The Scots could learn a thing or two about ethical animal treatment from us. We could probably also teach them a thing or two about trousers.
Today in History:
January 25, 1927 - Antonio Carlos Jobim, composer and primary force behind the creation of the bossa nova style, was born on this date.
If you are in your mid 40's, you probably wouldn't have been born without the help of this guy - go ask your parents.
January 25, 1938 - Etta James, blues, soul, R&B, rock & roll, gospel and jazz singer and songwriter, was born.
Pour yourself a double and listen to some powerful music.
January 25, 1947 - Anita Pallenberg, model, actress, fashion designer and bathtub companion to Mick Jagger, was born on this date.
January 25, 1947 - Mobster Al Capone dies in Florida, released from Alcatraz , due to his declining health (his mind gone from long untreated syphilis.)
January 25, 1960 -
Actress Diana Barrymore, Drew's aunt, commits suicide with alcohol and sleeping pills.
January 25, 1971 - Idi Amin Dada, everybody's favorite tyrant, comes to power in Uganda. Forest Whitaker won a Golden Globe award, a BAFTA, the Screen Actors' Guild award for Best Actor (Drama), and the Academy Award for Best Actor for his portrayal of this cannibal.
Hopefully, Forest isn't a method actor.
January 25, 1971 - Charles Manson and three of his followers are convicted in Los Angeles of the Tate and LaBianca murders. All were sentenced to the gas chamber, with sentences commuted to life imprisonment when the death penalty was temporarily abolished.
January 25, 1990 - An Avianca Boeing 707 ran out of fuel and crashed in Cove Neck, N.Y.; 73 of the 161 people aboard were killed.
January 24, 2003 - The United States Department of Homeland Security is 6 years old today.
Do you let your 6 year old play with guns and protect the Homeland?
Today in History:
January 24, 41 -
Roman emperor and crackpot Caligula is assassinated by his bodyguards. His last words apparently were, "I am still alive! Strike again."
Yeah, yeah, I know you know that the Roman Emperor Caligula made his horse a senator and a god, married his sister, slept with the horse. I guess this guy got more unnatural things done in a day then most of us do in a lifetime.
January 24, 1848 - James W. Marshall finds gold at Sutter's Mill near Sacramento, starting the California gold rush.
January 24, 1908 The first Boy Scout troop is organized in England by its founder, Robert Baden-Powell, a man who enjoyed seeing and photographing naked boys swimming just a little too much.
It is odd that such a homophobic organization would be founded by a repressed homosexual.
January 24, 1927 - Alfred Hitchcock, former titles writer for silent movies, releases his first film, The Pleasure Garden, in England.
January 24, 1947 Warren William Zevon, singer-songwriter and musician, was born on this date.
Remember kid's - Enjoy every sandwich.
January 24, 1949 - John Belushi, actor and comedian, was born on this date.
Because, I'm a dancer!!!
January 24, 1978 The nuclear-powered Soviet Cosmos 954 satellite plunges through Earth's atmosphere and disintegrates, scattering radioactive debris over parts of Canada's Northwest Territories. Much of the satellite lands in the Great Slave Lake; only about 1% of the radioactive material is recovered.
Hey, I hope we all enjoyed that smoked salmon from Canada in the late 70's.
January 24, 1986 Crackpot and founder of the fraudulent Scientology movement, L. Ron Hubbard dies. His bad science fiction writing has grown alarmingly prolific in the years since his death.
Hopefully, neither Tom Cruise or John Travolta read this.
Today in History: January 23, 1897 - Elva Zona Heaster is found dead in Greenbrier County, West Virginia.
The resulting murder trial of her husband is perhaps the only case in United States history where the alleged testimony of a ghost helped secure a conviction.
January 23, 1948 - John Huston's classic film, Treasure of Sierra Madre, starring Humphrey Bogart opens on this date.
January 23, 1975 - Barney Miller, a TV series set in a New York City police station in Greenwich Village, premieres on ABC TV.
January 23, 1978 - Terry Kath of band Chicago accidentally kills himself while pretending to play Russian Roulette in Woodland Hills. The circumstances of his death gave him the dubious distinction of being one of the first celebrities to be nominated for a Darwin Award.
Moral: Remember guns don't kill - that one bullet in the chamber does.
January 23, 1985 - O.J. Simpson was inducted into the Football Hall of Fame. The great Buffalo running back, Leslie Nielsen sidekick, and alleged decapitator was the first Heisman Trophy winner to be inducted.
He remains the only inductee to the Hall of Fame to have been acquitted of double homicide.
To satisfy conspiracy theorists, The President took the oath of office again in a private ceremony with the well rehearsed Chief Justice. Now, if only these guys will deal with the fact that he IS a US citizen and not a member of a Muslim terrorist group.
Today is the birthday of Grand Duke Ivan III of Moscow, better known as Ivan the Great.
He was born in 1440 and became Grand Duke of Moscow in 1462. Although Moscow was a lot of fun, it was not yet Russia. Ivan was determined to remedy that shortcoming as quickly as possible: he had tsars in his eyes.
To enlarge his dominions he began nibbling at his smaller neighbors, paying an annual tribute to the
Golden Horde of Tatars to keep them from nibbling at him. Having eventually swallowed most of his surroundings, Ivan decided in 1480 that it was time to stop paying the Golden Horde.
The Golden Horde reminded him that it was time for their annual tribute. Ivan ignored them.
The Golden Horde sent him polite reminders in the mail, but he ignored these also.
They sent reminders on brightly colored stationery embossed with the words PAYMENT PAST DUE, but Ivan, alas, remained indifferent.
Finally the Golden Horde marched against Ivan and he marched his own troops out to meet them. The two armies met, faced off, and simultaneously retreated.
This was a victory for Ivan, in that neither he nor his descendants ever paid tribute to the Golden Horde again. But it was also a defeat for Ivan, who was therefore denied the rank of tsar.
(The first real tsar of Russia was his grandson, Ivan IV, "the shooting tsar.")
January 22, 1521 - The Holy Roman Emperor, Charles V commenced the imperial Diet of Worms, on this date, to address the issues Martin Luther brought up in his 95 Theses.
While worms in general are quite unpleasant to consume, most people were afraid to contridict the Emperor, so many people in Europe became Protestant.
It was on this date in 1807 that U.S. President Thomas Jefferson exposed a plot by his former vice-president and unconvicted murderer, Aaron Burr, to establish an empire in the southwestern part of the continent. Burr was eventually acquitted as a result of Chief Justice Marshall's "tree-falling-in-forest" ruling that treason wasn't treason unless someone was there to see it—along with someone else who saw the same thing. The vice-presidency was never the same.
From that date forward, retiring vice-presidents have been compelled to either retire into the political obsolescence of private life, where we can safely ignore them, or into the presidency, where we can keep an eye on them (or in Dick Cheney's case, get to run the government away from prying eyes.)
January 22, 1901 - Alexandrina Victoria (Hanover, if she needed a last name) the Queen of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland and Empress of India of the British Raj, finally gave up the ghost - much to the relief of her 59 year old son Edward, permitting him to finally get a job.
January 22, 1905
In 1905, thousands of demonstrating Russian workers were fired on by Imperial army troops in St. Petersburg on what became known as "Red Sunday" or "Bloody Sunday".
96 people were killed, and over 300 were wounded. This incident marks the beginning of the so-called 1905 revolution.
January 22, 1918 Manitoba, Canada film censor board decides to ban comedies, on the grounds that they make audiences "too frivolous".
Canada does not fully recover their true "frivolousness" until the broadcasting of SCTV in the early 80's.
January 22, 1972 In an interview with Melody Maker, musician David Bowie announces that he is gay. Actually he is bisexual, and his wife Angela did catch him in bed with Mick Jagger.
Remember the famous quote about Cary Grant, (e-mail me if you forgot it.)
January 22, 1973 - The Supreme Court of the United States delivers its decision in Roe v. Wade, allowing abortion
January 22, 1984 - The future began today. The Apple Macintosh, the first consumer computer to popularize the computer mouse and the graphical user interface, was introduced during Super Bowl XVIII with its famous "1984" television commercial.
He tried to fool the President into taking the oath of office of Freedonia
But our new President was smarter than that and took the right oath. And among the many wonderful gifts he received for playing our game (besides the lovely photo and crystal bowl), Beyonce serenaded him and his wife (on national TV, no less.)
America, what a country!
Today in History:
January 21, 1793 - On Monday, 21 January 1793, stripped of all titles and honorifics by the republican government, citizen Louis Capet was guillotined in front of a cheering crowd in what today is the Parisian Place de la Revolution. The executioner, Charles Henri Sanson, testified that the former King had bravely met his fate. An early "urban legend" has the King months earlier suggesting a slant and beveling of the blade, for better cutting action.
Sometimes, people should just keep their opinions to themselves.
January 21, 1908 - New York City passes the Sullivan Ordinance, making it illegal for women to smoke in public,
only to have the measure vetoed by Mayor George Brinton McClellan, Jr., two weeks later.
January 21, 1924 - Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov (Vladimir I. Lenin) driving force behind the Russian Revolution of 1917 and the first great dictator of the Soviet Union dies from a massive stroke on this date.
Lenin, idolized during his life -- an icon after his death, helped along by an unusual effort to preserve his corpse. For decades after his death, Russians lined up in all weather to view Lenin's body on display in a glass container inside a special mausoleum in Red Square. A triumph of the embalmer's art, the corpse was removed on a regular basis for the special top-secret treatments that kept it looking remarkably lifelike.
I'm going to let you sick puppies go on your own to this site -
you can enjoy the sight of the nude, mummified corpse of Lenin getting his rejuvenating bath.
January 21, 1957 - Patsy Cline sang Walking After Midnight on Arthur Godfrey's nighttime television show, quickly launching her career
January 21, 1959 - Former Our Gang child star Carl 'Alfalfa' Switzer arrived at Moses "Bud" Stiltz's home in Mission Hills, California, to settle an alleged debt owed to Switzer. Previously, Switzer had borrowed a dog from Stiltz which was lost, but eventually found, Switzer paying the man who returned the dog $50. Switzer went to Stiltz's house to collect the money "owed" him. He banged on Stiltz's front door, demanding that he let him in, flashing a fake police badge. Once Switzer got inside he and Stiltz got into an argument. Switzer informed Stiltz that he wanted the money owed him. However, when Stiltz refused to hand over the money, the two engaged in a physical fight. Switzer bashed Stiltz in the head with a lamp, which caused Stiltz to bleed from his left eye. Stiltz retreated to his bedroom and returned holding a gun, but Switzer immediately grabbed the gun away from Stiltz, which resulted in a shot being fired but neither man being hit. Then Switzer forced Stiltz into a closet, despite Stiltz having gotten his hands back on the gun. Switzer then allegedly pulled out a knife and was attempting to stab Stiltz with it. But just as Switzer was about to charge Stiltz, Stiltz raised the gun and shot Switzer in the chest. Switzer died of intense blood loss while on his way to the hospital. He was 31 years old.
Switzer's death was largely ignored in the media, mainly because director Cecil B. DeMille had died on the same day. Kids, never loan a dog to a former child star.
January 21, 1960 The Little Joe 1B was a Launch Escape System test of the Mercury spacecraft, conducted as part of the U.S. Mercury program, on this date. The mission also carried a female Rhesus monkey (Macaca mulatta) named Miss Sam in the Mercury spacecraft. The six pound monkey survived the 8 minute 35 second flight in good condition.
Miss Sam retired fro the space program and enjoyed a successfully career in the "Straw Hat" theatre circuit, starring in among other things, "The Little Foxes" and "A Doll's House".
January 21, 1968 - A B-52 bomber crashes near Thule Air Base, contamining the area after its nuclear payload ruptures. One of the four bombs remains unaccounted for after the cleanup operation is complete.
If you have the bomb, the US government would be happy to take it off your hands - no questions asked.
While we watch the inauguration of the 44th President of the United States, let's take a quick look back at the 43rd - not in anger but appreciation for what he has accomplished:
1.) No other major terrorist attack since 911.
2.) Cat and dogs have not reared up on their hind legs and intermarried.
3.) We have not been invaded by Martians.
4.) Tupak, although dead has been allowed to produce and release several albums.
)
5.) Celine Dion has been more or less successfully contained in the Las Vegas vicinity.
6.) Speaking of Las Vegas, due to a ban on Nuclear (go ahead admit it, you're going to miss how he says NUCLEAR) tests, 50 foot Women are no longer on the prowl in the Southwest.
7.) Ditto for Helmet wearing gorillas.
8.) Reports of women being molested and eaten by carpet remnants are way down.
9.) The US Men Gymnastics team was never beaten by a Giant Japanese Turtle.
10.) Although Jay Leno has 'retired' (forced off) the Tonight Show; he somehow will appear every night at 10 PM on NBC.
So I say, thank you George Bush, America salutes you.
Here is your Today in History -
Jimmy Naismith was born in Ramsay township in Ontario, Canada in 1861. He grew up and eventually went to McGill University in Montreal. He became their Athletic Director and in 1891 he moved to Springfield, Massachusetts, to take a post at the YMCA Training School. It was there that he was confronted with the problem of developing a game that could be played indoors and in relatively little space.
On January 20, 1892, with only two peach baskets, a soccer ball, and a hand-written list of 13 rules, Dr. Naismith oversaw the world's first full game of a brand new sport, a sport that took its name from the peach baskets and soccer ball used to play it.
He had finally invented peach soccer (as opposed to Peachbasket - see January 15.)
January 20, 1936 - King George V of England is euthanized with injections of cocaine and morphine, after a painful cancer illness. His final words, a mumbled "God damn you!", were addressed to his nurse when she gave him a sedative before his final lethal injection. His physician was motivated not only to ameliorate the king's suffering, but also to break the story in the morning edition of the newspapers, "rather than the less appropriate evening journals." Remember kids - Promptness is the politeness of kings.
At the procession to George's Lying in State in Westminster Hall, as the cortege turned into New Palace Yard, the Maltese Cross fell from the Imperial Crown and landed in the gutter. The new King, Edward VIII, saw it fall and wondered whether this was a bad omen for his new reign. He would abdicate before the year was out.
January 20, 1946 - David Keith Lynch, director, screenwriter, producer, painter, cartoonist, composer, video and performance artist, was born on this date.
What a slacker.
January 20, 1956 - Bill Maher, actor, comedian, political analyst and professional Bush despiser, was born on this date.
Hopefully he'll get a new hobby (like pot smoking.)
January 20, 1982 - Rock musician Ozzy Osbourne is hospitalized in Des Moines IA after he bites the head off of a dead bat. The bat was tossed on stage by a fan during a live performance.
